January 012 is finally here and this is my third new year since my divorce. Each year has gotten easier and better and I have been able to slowly set new goals and get my feet back on the ground. This hasn't been easy and more often than not, I have wanted to throw in the towel. I am speaking mainly of my physical self and how I have felt since I became a single parent. Prior to this, I was fairly active. In 2007 I completed my first triathlon here in Philadelphia, and became somewhat hooked, competing in several more in 2008. 2009 brought me to a torn meniscus, microfracture surgery and 6 weeks on crutches. However, coming back after that, I was swimming faster than ever and kettlebell training harder than ever. I actually had some serious shoulders developing and I was really psyched. I successfully competed in many ocean swims in the summer of '09. I was on a roll. Then my life literally fell apart. For those of you who know and have read my blog, I won't go into the details again. All eating, exercise, racing, and training stopped. I did go to Yoga in 2010 to give myself some credit. In 2010 in September, I did race in the Nations Tri in D.C. with a good friend of mine who had been racing with me ever since, and since fall of '09 had taken off way ahead of me as far as training etc. She had hit the ground running while I was picking up shattered pieces of my messy life. It was understandable. What I didn't know, is that over the next 20 months, I would have massive migraines, horrible stomach problems, 1000s of sleepless nights, no appetite and at some point a 15 pound weight gain. (this was more weight than I had on me two weeks after having my daughter)
I was sick, and also very frustrated because I looked heavy and puffy and tired, and my stomach was blown up like a balloon. NONE of my pants were able to be buttoned and my shirts didn't even really fit! It was not fun. In the fall of 2010, I went to a holistic practicing doctor. He put me on a diet of lentils, cumin and other spices, and lots of dark leafy greens, no dairy and no cheese. By the late winter of 2011 I started to feel okay, and I began a very small exercise program. By May of 2011 I saw a sports nutritionist and started swimming and lifting 5 days a week for one hour. She gave me a calorie diet and some foods to avoid. I was eating regularly again, my metabolism was starting to work again, and I got the clear from the GI doctor that there was in fact NOTHING really wrong with me except stress. I just plugged away at this food plan and the exercise, even on days I didn't want too!
I decided to take 2011 OFF from racing, I wasn't ready or fit enough. The 2010 Nations Tri proved to me that I wasn't ready or in a mental state that I needed to be to perform in these multisport events. I had a panic attack in the water during the race, and during the run, I was physically exhausted. It was raining while I was racing, and I was hating it!
In the summer of 011, I swam with my buddies, and I swung my 15 lb bell until my arms were about to fall off. Very slowly my legs began to get fitter, and my arms got toner, a little bit at a time. My swimming times were getting good again. I took a real look at my life, no husband, no real time for multisport training. So I decided that for now, I will possibly race in 2012 but only in ocean swims, and aquavelos. Aquavelos are the "swim-bike" portion of the triathlon, and many events offer just this!
So I put my scale in the closet, not to obsess over weighing myself. I am built like an athlete, and I have the potential to get very strong. I will get fit again, no matter what I weigh. I am older than I was three years ago, so who knows what my body will do. I am getting my food plan re-evaluated, and I am going to get a real training program come spring. I am going to graduate to a 20 lb kettlebell. I think I am going to find three small races this summer and race them! The goal is small and attainable, this will ensure some kind of mental and physical success which is what I need. I am going to take it one month at a time. .. and evaluate at the end of each month, and make changes when needed. As I get older, I am okay with the flaws that I have, and I understand that some things work for me and some things don't. What works for my friends as far as food and training doesn't necessarily work for me. That is okay, so I will honor it and work with it!
I am thinking about dedicating this years blog to my training, hopefully my racing, my eating, and overall health. There is plenty to write about. Come spring I will be able to ride my bike, which is an entire blog on it's own considering that fact that I have NO IDEA really how to ride my road bike, so this year is a good year to learn. I don't have to ride 50 mile rides, but I can get out and get busy on it!
I didn't totally blow the month of December off, but the last two weeks were rough, and not productive as far as food and exercise. So today, I am making Salmon for dinner and rice, and sauteed spinach! Yummy! And I am off to the Y, so I can get on a bike for a bit and at least get my legs moving !!!!!!
